The 'fight' that was a debate is the Doctor's modus operandi, it was just a big change from when he actually fought during his last regeneration with his magical deus ex explody ship powers.
We already know that the doctor would kill to protect Earth (see Nine->Ten's Christmas Regen episode, The Christmas Invasion), the first doctor was (arguably) prepared to kill 'just' to stop the party being slowed down (see the first story ever, An Earthly Child), but by not giving us a resolution to the pushme/pullyou scene they turned it into a cop out to make it seem more adult after the last doctor's childish whimsey; if they wanted to show it, show it, either way the doctor wins, either he's shown to be a man of iron clad principles he will not cross but so skilled at out thinking his opponents that he's a threat even when unarmed, or he's a man who tries to stick to the path but occassional falls off, making his 'debating enemies to death' all the more impressive as we know he could take the 'easy' route but he's trying to fight against himself and the enemy at the same time.
I think part of the point is to differentiate from earlier debut episodes. With both Tennant and Smith we had a clear idea of who the Doctor was more or less by the end of the episode, but by not showing whether or not Capaldi pushed the android, who he is and what exactly his moral compass is hasn't been fully shown. Discovering what kind of person he's become is something that he and Clara will be doing for more than one episode. This is a Doctor you're supposed to be unsure of, and the way the jump scene was handled was very thematically appropriate for that.
I think I have to agree with you, if the show wanted use to be undecided, the writing was quite poor. Consider the scene where the Doctor leaves Clara, did anybody really think that was going to really happen. The only way that scene even makes a little bit of sense is if the entire point of the scene was to tell you that he would never leave her and compromise his most basic principles.
The entire show was telling you about the Doctor's princples, and contrasting it with the villains. Both the Doctor and the villain were characters that could regenerate and come back to life, but in completely opposite ways. The villain would kill an entire creature just for a small part to stay alive. While the Doctor got an extra life for, seemingly, the sole purpose of protecting people.
If the final battle was supposed to be an actual question, the writing of the show simply didn't agree with it. Regardless, I have always felt that purposely not showing the audience something important (not something subtle) is always a sign of bad writing.
Or obvious trickery. Not showing a dead body, chances are they are not dead (which I guess amounts to bad writing anyway).
Oh! Thanks for reminding me about Clara. Clara doubting the doctor because he changed his face? When she has been with him through all his incarnations? Silly.
Clara's indecision doesn't really bother me. Just because you know something is going to happen, doesn't mean that it won't upset you when it does. She may have seen his other lives, but the Matt Smith Doctor was the first one she came to know, and she met his past selves with the knowledge that the Doctor she knew and familiar with was still around. She's familiar with the process of regeneration, but that doesn't mean she has no reason to be hurt when the Doctor she's known and befriended is suddenly gone and this strange person she doesn't know is there.
I personally liked how they handled the scene with the android. I think it sets the tone they want for this Doctor quite nicely, and I'll be interested to see if and how they incorporate it into later episodes.
One thing I did like is dealing with the issues of a romantic relationship head on. Both with Matt Smith's version and Peter Capaldi. In interviews leading up to the season, Peter Capaldi said there would be no romantic relatinship, and I really like how they addressed that issue. Especially, the explanation of why the Doctor now looks old. I think that one line set the tone for the entire season better than anything else in the episode.
Hurt at a loss and doubting they are the same person when you have seen them change multiple times by being with them every step of the way are not remotely the same.
If she had done things expecting the doctor to react in a certain way and he hadn't and then she reacted with disappointment, that's one thing. But being that at his rebirth after having seen what he was prepared to sacrificed with no personal gain* and treating him like a stranger, urg.
*Remember it was Clara who convinced Galifrey to help, not the doctor, he was there for hundreds of years and did not contact the people that he most wanted to for fear of unleashing war.
EDIT: She got her wish and was pissed about it. Ungrateful.
Except in a lot of ways the Doctor isn't the same person when he regenerates. Although some things stay the same, other things can change drastically which is something else Clara would've seen travelling through the Doctor's timeline and even with both Ten and the War Doctor. Again, she has no idea what this Doctor will be like now. She is profoundly hurt at the loss of her friend and has to come to terms with this new person.
And? He's not the same person but she knew it was going to be this way, she's seen and experienced it time and time again. She hurts from eleven's loss, she should be sad, but to blank 1.2 is just OTT for the character given everything she has experienced with all incarnations of the doctor before.
I should add some things that I did like about the episode so it's doesn't look like I'm just hating on it.
I did enjoy the exchange between the doctor and the robot when debating who's 'programming' would fall (even if I didn't enjoy the resolution), it set him up as a guy who thinks before acting, who is always thinking and noticing the small details even in the deadliest of dangers, which might be something that was downplayed from other doctors.
I also enjoyed Clara's exchange with the robot, not only because it showed that her faith in the doctor was rewarded but because she was able to draw on her experience from her 'regular' life to recognise a situation and apply it to an extraordinary one. her defiance while still being vulnerable was wonderfully played.
I don't think Clara remembers all her escapades through the doctor's timelines. If she does, I don't think it is an active memory.
Capaldi vs. the Robot: The Doctor has killed robots that are more human than that was many times. Also if he did push the robot he didn't violate his ethics, he lied about them, that's what he said, "One of us lied." Remember rule #1? The doctor lies.
I liked his rough regeneration, because this wasn't just a new regeneration, this was a brand new set of regenerations.
I loved the phone call, that is so Matt Smith's doctor, always thinking outside his timeline.
I like Capaldi a lot, the pace slowed, the characters solved problems creatively, the Doctor was arrogant but not intentionally insulting. It was great. Here's hoping we don't get another season of "Show that was even more EPIC than the last show!" Then I'll be a very happy camper.
It makes sense. Again, just because you're prepared for something beforehand doesn't mean you'll handle it perfectly when it does actually happen. It's kind of like the audience of the show. By now, we should all be prepared for when a new Doctor comes and be open minded about it, but there's always scrutiny and a portion of the fanbase instantly writing off the new Doctor even though this has happened several times before.
Overall, I really enjoyed this episode, mainly because I don't especially like Clara, and never had. It spent a lot of time dogging on her, and that's always a win. :-)
My biggest issue? The giant hammer that kept hitting me on the head to remind me that Vastra and Jenny are married. I get it, Jenny's wife has a cloaca; moving on. Wasn't this made clear enough before?
However, I do enjoy the Vastra/Jenny/Strax episodes. They always seem to crop up when The Doctor doesn't know what he's doing or who he is. Vastra has been nicely set up to be the compass he checks when he's lost, and she's the perfect one to do that.